3

One year, 3 months, 22 days and counting: The total amount of time that she had known him for, and yet, did she really know what he was all about?

Apparently not.

A breeze picked up, and she pulled her muffler tighter around her slender frame in an effort to escape the cold that was gnawing her from within. Words floated into her mind; sweet nothings, harsh remarks, words of comfort and encouragement, heartfelt praise, unfulfilled promises, blatant accusations and…the most painful of them all… indifferent goodbyes.

He had said, in his last, angry letter, that she knew absolutely nothing of him, and hence, had no right to lay claim to feelings for him.

Feelings. What was it that people called it? Ah – yes – Love. They called that ambiguous, formless, undependable emotion “Love”.

A half-smile played over her lips, dancing like a ghost over features that were upturned in the smallest, mocking gesture; stubbornly defiant in its outset, but clearly trembling beneath, under layers of false bravado and good cheer.

And she walked, a solitary, lonesome figure, bent against the cold December north winds… making her way to the famous bridge that overlooked the river at Dotomburi. As the crowds weaved in and out of walkway under the pale moonshine, she stood, back against the railing of the bridge, tired brown eyes flitting randomly from the huge Glico billboard on her left, to the reflection of the night lights on the water’s surface, and finally, resting on the fast-moving crowds crossing the bridge at that time of the night.

And suddenly, her heart stopped. She saw him – could it really be him? – walking briskly through the crowd, in his trademark leather jacket and dirty blue jeans, away from her, towards the station. She stared. Her mouth dropped open in a silent “oh”. She reached out her hand, out of pure instinct. As if to hold on to something – anything. As if to ascertain for herself that he was real. But then, even before she could move, he had disappeared. Once again, even as a memory, he had left her world.

Just the way she always knew he would.