5

The subway train was pulling away from the dirty platforms, taking her away from the blinding night life of downtown Osaka, away from the hallucinations and the false pretenses; away from the tears that she could not cry, and the final goodbyes that she could not enunciate.

As the train started gathering speed, the people and the station swirled into an indiscernible stream of blurred images, and she suddenly found herself mentally fast-forwarding her life, until the moment that she had met him over a year ago in Tokyo. From then on, the photographs stilled – froze – forever seared freshly into her mind’s eye, replaying in slow-motion, as if tantalizingly, jeeringly, forbiddingly... Odaiba, Tokyo Tower, Nikko, Asakusa –

Just then, her phone buzzed loudly, and she jolted out of her reverie in surprise. Who’d message her at 8pm on Friday night? Surely everyone (but her) would be out having the time of their lives? Unless... it couldn’t be, he’d promised never to contact her again... Wasn't that his last, and perhaps, only promise to her?

Heart clenching in fear and anticipation, she unzipped her bag and fumbled in jerky motions for her cellphone, and as she dug it out and flipped it open, her tiny heart crumbled instantaneously. Her friend, Mikki, had sent her an email.

Why should it have been anyone else...?

Biting her lip and blinking furiously to clear her suddenly blurred vision, she swallowed a lump in her throat, took a deep breath, and opened the email.

「遅くにごめ～んなぁ！今晩9時に法済学部２組は全員梅田で忘年会やるで！良かったら来てね！」

Her friend, Mikki, had invited her to their class’s Bounenkai at 9pm on that very night in Umeda. In Japan, Bounenkai’s were end-of-year gatherings meant to celebrate the passing of yet another year, and more importantly, to forget all the sorrows and the pain that the previous year had brought with it.

“Bounenkai..ka..” she murmured to herself, tired eyes taking on a faraway look. She hated alcohol, she hated drunks, she hated izakayas – but she wanted company. And she’d do anything to forget the past year and all the tears and joy that it had brought with it. It was too heavy a burden to shoulder for the year 2008.

Firming her resolve, she replied an “okay”. And, for the first time that night, she allowed her tense shoulders to sag a little in temporal relief.